I have no one to talk to about my situation, not even my best friends and family. This is a very private decision.
However, I need to know if I am thinking clearly and would so appreciate your help.
When the economy collapsed, so did our business. One year later and we are still living off of savings, depleting our retirement accounts just to stay alive. While I certainly realize that we were at least lucky enough to have this to fall back on, we are in our mid 50’s and this money is what we planned to retire on. Couple that with ,000 in credit card debt that has been incurred to pay our vendors when the business went down, by trying to do the right thing and not filing for bankruptcy, and this has taken a tremendous toll.
We have a differing opinion about how to move forward. I want to sell our home, in which we have significant equity, and move into a smaller, more modest home. The problem for my husband is that this is our dream home, a 3000 sq ft home we built 5 years ago and planned to live the rest of our lives in. I hope I don’t sound too obnoxious when I say it is a very beautiful home.
Of course we won’t get out of the home what we have into it, cash wise. We will be taking a pretty big loss because property values have dropped. I don’t care. While I WANT to live in this home, I don’t NEED to live in this home. My husband is not budging, and is content to spend what we have saved until the business can get going again. When………I have no clue. It’s not looking good.
I am so afraid to lose everything that we have worked so hard for these past 20 years. And if we continue on this path, we will.
I want to sell the house, restock the 401K to where it was, pay off all our credit card debt and purchase a more modest home.
He wants to stay in the house, use our saving to live with hopes that the business will come back.
I feel so desperate that I am thinking of filing for divorce so that I can at least protect my half of what’s left, forcing the sale of the home. I NEED that security. I can not live, hoping that things will turn around while watching every last cent of our retirement go to pay interest payments.
We have been to counseling for weeks now and he is still not giving. We have one HS child left at home. This would devastate our family, but I need that security.
Am I being unreasonable?
Thank you.
He is the one that wants to keep the "material" thing (the home), not me.
I want the security.
I am not trying to "recoup" cash. I want to take the cash to pay the bills we have racked up, buy a smaller home (smaller home, lower bills) and go from there.
I am not trying to "recoup" cash. I want to take the cash to pay the bills we have racked up, buy a smaller home (smaller home, lower bills) and go from there.
Mikey, We have a financial adviser and he is with me.
Opinions